The Jets haven’t won a game this season. They are 0 for 12. Any NFL fan knows this. As of now, New York is destined to own the No. 1 pick in next year’s draft because the Jets are woeful this fall.
Cue SNL’s “Sportsmax.” That’s the (fictitious) offshoot of Newsmax. The real news network is owned by Chris Ruddy, a close friend of President Donald Trump’s. The network runs stories about how Trump still has a chance to win November’s election. The electoral college meets Monday to vote on the winner. Based on past processes, it should be a formality for Joe Biden since all 50 states have certified the results.
According to Sportsmax, If New York Jets Fans Lost, It’s Because of Fraud
The skit featured Alex Moffat, as chief Jets fan Robert King and host of the show.
Moffat kicked off the sketch, saying “A lot of mainstream sports networks like ESPN are saying the Jets have not won a single game this year, that they’re 0-12.”
Then Beck Bennett as “Drew Matarazo” drops some (fantasy) knowledge.
“The truth is the Jets have already won 11 games this season,” Bennett said. “Now the experts tell you the Jets lost to the Bills 18-10 back in October. Sounds like a done deal, right? No, not so fast.”
Matarazo then shows the box score. It says the Jets were ahead 3-0 after the first quarter. “Then the Bills started getting points from God knows where. Either the Jets won 3-0 or this whole game was rigged.”
Enter Pete Davidson and Saturday’s host Timothy Chalamet. Both were dressed in Jets gear and noshing on a heaping plate of french fries. With their mustaches, the pair looked a lot like the Chicago super fans featured in the SNL classic “Da Bears” sketches from the 1990s.
The two, nicknamed Deluca and Delvechio, questioned the results of the Jets-Miami game.
Chalamet started screaming, “I have in my hand right here sworn affidavits from 500 Jets fans who swear they witnessed a Jets win.”
Davidson says” the are 8 million people with nothing to gain about lying about this. Are you going to tell me, 8 million people, that the Jets didn’t actually beat the Dolphins, 90-0?”
And, SNL Wants You To Know Jeremy Lin Is GOAT 0f NBA
The imaginary sports show then switches to two super fans of the New York Knicks. They make the case that Jeremy Lin, because of four days in 2012, should be considered the G.O.A.T. of the NBA. It’s “Linsanity”!
The sketch ended with a nod to a new spinoff, Weathermax. There was a live shot of a reporter standing in front of the Jets stadium. It’s snowing. The reporter is bragging about the perfect sunny weather.