New York Man Accused of Trying to Smuggle Snakes Across Border by Stuffing Them in His Pants

by Suzanne Halliburton
Peerapon Boonyakiat/SOPA Images/LightRocket via Getty Images

If snakes creep you out, maybe avoid this story. Otherwise, did you hear about the guy who (allegedly) stuffed three pythons in his pants?

Trust us, there is no punchline to this story. A New York man was arraigned Tuesday after a federal indictment charged him with trying to smuggle three Burmese pythons from Canada to the United States. The feds allege that Calvin Bautista, a 36-year-old from Richmond Hill, New York, was riding a bus into the U.S. And U.S. Customs discovered the pythons in his pants.

Both the U.S. Fish & Wildlife Service and U.S. Customs and Border Protection are investigating the case. The feds don’t like it when someone smuggles in snakes. In other words, pythons in the pants are a no-go. Bautista, if found guilty, faces up to 20 years in prison and fined $250,000, with a supervised release of up to three years.

How Big Were the Pythons in His Pants? We’ll Have to Wait for Trial

Attorneys for the Northern District of New York stressed that the charges are only accusations at this point. But in detailing the accusations, the district attorney’s office didn’t release certain details. Like we don’t know the length of the pythons he stuck in his pants. The snakes are native to Southeast Asia. However, they’ve become a problem in the United States, particularly in the Florida Everglades. There’s even a python challenge in the state. Florida gives away a ton of prizes for removing the pythons, albeit not by stashing them in the pants.

But if you’re curious, we’ve got some Burmese python facts. They’re among the five largest snakes in the world. Some people keep them as pets. For snakes, they’re considered quite docile. However, the snakes are aggressive feeders, so it’s not recommended to put the pythons in your pants. We shouldn’t need to tell anyone that.